my last post was a more than a year ago.



anyway, nothing much, really, just, hi!

school has started, not really excited especially with all the work load.
any kind of work is a load and will always be a burden.

been missing my time online, but i guess i cant forgo rl for the internet.
i wish i really could because there are so many people i miss; viva, acire, nabila, mina, rella, anne, mel, roz and everyone i know :\

then its sad because i've made new friends online but i don't get the chance to bond with them ;A;


and then it's sad when you find out people you are fond of have already left the forest but, i'm a person who will never get tired of waiting.


like just how i am willing to wait for j.

how am i supposed to feel.

i didn't do good.
neither did i do bad.

basically, i just need to rant.
every hour, every minute, every second that passes by brings me closer to the day. D DAY if some would call it.


i'm really afraid, lord knows why. to be honest and fair, i never did study hard enough for this. everything i said i would do, ended up being empty promises that will eventually sabotage my life.

they say you reap what you sow, i clearly understand and stand by this but, the question remains: why, why, why?

why didn't i study hard enough?
why didn't i practice more?
why didn't i listen to everyone around me who warned me not to take this lightly?

come what may, i will embrace it with open arms and make the best of what i have.




why, why, why.